What Meditation Actually Is (And Why Most People Misunderstand It)

Coralie Bengoechea
Dec 29, 2025
4 min read

Updated: Dec 30, 2025

Many people give up on meditation because it feels difficult or uncomfortable. This article explores what meditation actually is, why it often feels hard at first, and how that discomfort is part of the practice.

Written by Coralie Bengoechea | 29 December 2025

Meditation is often described as a way to quiet the mind, reduce stress, or feel calm. Yet for many people, the actual experience feels very different.

They sit down and their thoughts race. Their body feels restless. They feel uncomfortable, distracted, or like they’re doing it wrong. So they stop.

This reaction is incredibly common, and it comes from a misunderstanding of what meditation actually is. Meditation isn’t about stopping thoughts or forcing relaxation. It’s a practice of awareness: learning how to stay present with the mind, body, and nervous system exactly as they are. In modern life, that can feel surprisingly difficult.

Why Sitting Still Feels So Uncomfortable Now

Meditation didn’t get harder. Our lives got louder.

Most of us move from stimulus to stimulus all day long. Noise, screens, conversations, tasks, information. There’s very little space where nothing is being asked of us.

So when you sit down and remove all of that, the system reacts. Thoughts speed up. The body fidgets. Emotions surface. People assume something has gone wrong.

Actually, something honest is happening: You’re meeting the state your nervous system has been in all along.

Meditation Doesn’t Create Restlessness — It Reveals It

Meditation isn’t inserting chaos into your mind. It’s removing distractions.

When there’s nothing to scroll, fix, or consume, whatever has been waiting underneath finally gets space to show up. That might be tension. Or worry. Or sadness. Or just mental noise. That isn’t failure. It’s awareness.

Most of the time, we’re too busy to notice how dysregulated we actually are. Meditation simply makes it visible.

This Isn’t About Feeling Calm All the Time

Meditation isn’t a technique for feeling good on demand.

Sometimes it feels settling. Sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes it’s boring, uncomfortable, or unexpectedly emotional.

The benefit isn’t the immediate feeling. It’s what builds over time.

You’re training yourself to notice without reacting. To feel without immediately needing to change the feeling. To stay with experience instead of escaping it.

That capacity quietly reshapes how you meet everything else in life.

What Meditation Is Doing in the Body

A woman practising meditation at the beach.

On a nervous system level, meditation is very simple.

You’re repeatedly showing your body that it’s safe to pause.

No emergency. No threat. Nothing you need to solve right now.

At first, the body doesn’t believe you. With repetition, it starts to learn.

That’s where the real change happens.

There Isn’t One Right Way to Meditate

Meditation can be practised in many different ways.

This is where many people get stuck: They think meditation has to look a certain way. Sitting upright. Legs crossed. Long sessions. A silent mind.

None of that is essential.

Meditation can happen while sitting, lying down, walking, breathing, or simply noticing what’s happening without interference. If awareness is present, the practice is happening.

Some Simple Ways People Actually Meditate

Some people sit and follow the breath, noticing it move in and out without trying to control it. Some move attention slowly through the body, feeling where tension lives and where it doesn’t. Some repeat a word or phrase quietly, letting the rhythm anchor the mind. Some listen to guided practices because having a voice helps them stay present. Some walk slowly and place attention on the sensation of their feet touching the ground. Some simply sit and watch thoughts come and go without getting involved.

None of these are better than the others. They’re just different doorways.

Start Smaller Than Feels Impressive

Breath awareness can be an effective practice.

Most people quit meditation because they aim too high.

They try to sit for too long, expect too much, or wait until they can “do it properly.”

The nervous system doesn’t learn through effort. It learns through repetition.

One minute a day, done consistently, will change more than a long session you avoid.

Meditation Isn’t an Escape From Life

It doesn’t remove stress, stop thoughts, or make you immune to difficulty.

What it does is create space: Space between you and your reactions. Space between thoughts and action. Space between feeling overwhelmed and being overwhelmed.

That space gives you choice.

The Quiet Shift That Happens Over Time

A man practising walking meditation in winter.

Something subtle happens when you meditate regularly.

You stop being afraid of your own inner experience. You realise you can sit with discomfort without breaking. You don’t need constant stimulation to be okay. You don’t need to fix every feeling immediately.

That trust changes how you move through the world.